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At first, I ignored my crush on my roommate — but of course, trying not to like someone almost always has the opposite effect.

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It was the early days of the pandemic and I had just moved from Tucson to Costa Mesa for a new job. But I soon found a room for rent in a big house with four people who were all very welcoming to me and my dog — particularly the roommate I would be sharing a bathroom with. Affairs: L. Thanks to therapy, to the pandemic, to stillness, to time and unbearable loneliness, I am looking back on all the people that have entered my life over the years as gifts. As the pandemic stretched on, we spent more and more time together, working out, chatting for hours and playing a lot of chess which can be a very flirtatious game.

I started to crush. Maybe this was meant to happen? Orange County, the hiking gem you need to know. Here are the 12 best trails. So, I dived in. We both said we wanted something serious, not just a roommate-with-benefits situation. He knew so much about Orange County and showed me around to the extent we could at the time so mostly just hiking and takeout. I was on top of the world, despite the world having been turned upside down. I started to feel more at home here in Southern California, the pandemic merely background noise. It was horrible at first. But that first night after our breakup, he knocked on my door.

He said that even though he was the one making me upset, he was there to talk if I wanted. His kindness impressed me and seemed to prove we could be friends. And, after a few weeks, we were. Affairs: Why does dating at 67 feel like high school all over again? So, I cornered him in the kitchen. Affairs: What the guy at the deli counter taught me about love.

I was still recovering from breast cancer. And my heart was shattered. This time, he was not kind. My main hang. A few weeks later, he invited her for the weekend for his birthday party. She lived a few hours away in his hometown. It seemed too soon to have the girl with whom he replaced me so suddenly as a houseguest. I braved his birthday party because hiding in my room was my only other option.

Affairs: This is why I ignored the warnings against a workplace romance. I was obviously smitten, but he — recently divorced and emerging from a series of unsatisfactory relationships — did not seem to want anything more than to be friends. When she was staying over, I tried to be chill about it — but that was almost impossible.

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She was loud and obnoxious, both in everyday conversation and during sex. I could hear her ridiculous moaning from the bathroom between our two bedrooms. The worst was when he was back in the office and I was working from home while she was staying over. Her constant presence was irritating. She hung around all day doing nothing, except taking hourlong showers and cooking him dinner without cleaning up.

During one extended stay, I asked him when she was leaving. So I flipped out. As it did for many people, brought out behavior and emotions far outside my usual repertoire: I yelled at him, cried, threatened to tell her about us I doubt she ever knew and trashed my room in a fit of rage.

She left the next day. The 8 best easy Southern California hikes with great ocean views. Even though I am over him, it still hurts to lose a close friend and watch him become just a stranger who rarely cleans our shared bathroom. Born and raised in L. As time passes, I realize there is no easy way out of dating your roommate, and perhaps that was him doing his best. We barely talk now, except for official roommate business, and we still both like the house more than we hate living with each other.

So we manage to coexist despite the brutal breakup. You can find her on Instagram at annabananajennings. Affairs chronicles the search for romantic love in all its glorious expressions in the L. LAAffairs latimes. You can find submission guidelines here. They turned a one-car garage into a stunning ADU to house their parents. You can too. Keep this L. See if you can count the multitudes in these self-portraits by Clifford Prince King. All Sections. About Us. B2B Publishing. Business Visionaries. Hot Property.

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Times Events. Times Store. Facebook Twitter Show more sharing options Share Close extra sharing options. By Anna Jennings. I was not attracted to him. At all. Until we both started working from home. Lifestyle L. Travel Orange County, the hiking gem you need to know. Travel The 8 best easy Southern California hikes with great ocean views. More From the Los Angeles Times. Lifestyle They turned a one-car garage into a stunning ADU to house their parents. Image Keep this L. Image See if you can count the multitudes in these self-portraits by Clifford Prince King.

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